Until you know someone better, it’s always a good idea to meet him there. Prioritizing safe transportation is crucial when preparing for a first-date. Opting for personal transportation, such as your vehicle or a reputable taxi service, enhances your control over the situation. By relying on your own means or a trusted transportation service, you retain independence and foster a sense of security. Avoiding rides offered by your date during the initial encounter not only maintains your autonomy but also serves as a proactive measure to safeguard personal safety. This approach allows you to navigate the date on your terms, ensuring a comfortable and secure experience.
- “When you drink alcohol, it brings down your defenses,” says Engle.
- Avoid disclosing too much personal information, for example where you live and work, she says.
- Review the evidence and its limits before deciding what comes next.
- If the situation persists or escalates, be prepared to assert your boundaries more assertively and, if necessary, to exit the situation promptly.
Trust Your Instincts 🤔
Keep these tips in mind, invest in pepper spray, and listen to your gut. That way, if a potentially dangerous situation arises, you won’t be caught off guard. Check his LinkedIn profile instead of Facebook, which is more professional and will give you an idea of who he is without taking the fun out of your first date.
You do not need to wait for a major red flag. A date can end because the conversation is flat, because your stomach says no, or because you simply want your couch. “Thanks for meeting me—I’m going to head out” is enough. If you need help, move toward staff, call a friend, or request your ride from inside the venue. Stay aware without making yourself miserable.
Quick Before-the-date Checklist
Or maybe you’re replaying that awful date that ended with having your mom send you a fake emergency text (no judgment—we’ve all been there). You’re pumped—ready to get out there, have some fun, and meet someone new. Before you go on a first date, make sure you know how to keep yourself safe! Relationship and dating expert Kelly Marie joined us to share her first-date safety checklist. No matter how comfortable you feel about meeting your date for the first time, there are a few tried-and-true ways to keep yourself as safe as possible. « I’m not comfortable with that » is a complete sentence.
If your date gives you grief for sticking to your budget, that’s their hang-up, not yours. It might be an early sign they’re not for you. Carefully consider questions they may ask in return. Don’t ask so many questions that it feels like a job interview or interrogation. Keep it fun and be curious about the other person. Instead of judging their answers, appreciate this person’s individuality.
Expert-approved First Date Tips
If you feel unsafe, go to the nearest staff member and ask for help — many restaurants and bars have protocols for this exact situation. « Just meet in a public place » is solid advice. Match.com’s safety tips and dating safety experts all recommend it. Carry Pepper Spray You can never take too many safety precautions when you’re a single girl, and carrying pepper spray is a great way to have a little extra reassurance. If your date threatens you in any way, you’ll be able to defend yourself quickly and easily.
Before stepping out for your date, take a moment to reach out to a trusted friend or family member. Share comprehensive details regarding your plans – the exact location, scheduled time, and information about the individual you will meet. It’s crucial to ensure someone you trust is fully informed about your whereabouts and the context of your meeting. Consider selecting a public venue, like a bustling coffee shop filled with chatter, a well-lit restaurant buzzing with activity, or a lively park frequented by many people. It’s safer to keep your personal information private, especially at first, until you’ve decided whether you trust your match with it. Once you’ve established your online safety boundaries, it’s time to consider your physical safety in preparation for the first date.
By carefully preparing for your date, knowing the do’s and don’t’s while on your date, and knowing what to do in an emergency situation, you can be sure to have a fun, safe first date. You can be direct (« I’ve asked you to stop, and since you won’t, I’m leaving ») or excuse yourself to the restroom and then leave through another exit if you feel unsafe being direct. Your priority is getting to safety, not managing their feelings.
Dating safety experts emphasize that preparation isn’t paranoia — it’s how you ensure you can enjoy the date and come home safely. None of it will help if the date goes sideways and you’re in a situation you didn’t plan for. Going on a first date can be exciting and nerve-wracking, but it’s important to stay safe at every point of the date. Here are some precautionary steps you can take. It’s good manners to check in after your first date and thank the other person for spending time with you and taking you out (or letting you take them out).
Bartenders, servers, and security personnel are often trained to assist people in uncomfortable dating situations. Some establishments even have code words or signals you can use to discreetly request assistance. Meet in a Public Place Always choose to meet in a public place—the more people, the better. If your date insists that they want to meet somewhere more private, don’t give in. Suggest meeting at a coffee shop or a busy restaurant and checking the other spot out if the first few dates go well. You should always avoid being singled out and alone with your date for too long, at least at the beginning.
The truth is, you’re not for everybody, and not everyone is for you. The right person will find your quirks and imperfections lovable, so there’s no need to shape-shift your way into a stranger’s approval. The sooner you and your date can be your authentic selves, the sooner you’ll be able to truly get to know each other. Watching your language is more than not swearing like a sailor. It means you don’t speak badly about other people, yourself and especially your ex-romantic partners.
Consider creating a safe word or phrase with your friends if you feel uncomfortable speaking openly about the situation with your date. You can always have your friend meet you there so you can leave together. If you experience anxiety, safety planning can actually reduce stress by giving you concrete control measures.
If at any point you suspect you may have been drugged, don’t hesitate to leave and get help right away. Our team has found that reputable dating sites often have built-in safety features, but it’s crucial to take personal responsibility for your safety. By following our guidelines, you can enjoy your first https://www.theupcoming.co.uk/2025/05/07/whats-the-buzz-lauradate-reviews-from-trustpilot-reddit-and-more/ date without unnecessary worry. If you’re nervous about your date, take a deep breath in, hold it for three seconds, and let it out.
Some apps have thorough verification processes, such as asking users to provide a driver’s licence, and easy reporting procedures if you experience abuse, she says. Ahead of a date it’s worth asking yourself, « How do I make sure this person is comfortable around me? » says community advocate Jacquie O’Brien. « We all have the capacity to cause harm, make someone feel uncomfortable, and discriminate. » CallSafe costs €1.99 for a single check-in call at the time you choose.
